The Blessing of Remembering

Today, I came home from work so tired I didn’t even take off my boots or coat, I just laid down. I didn’t expect to sleep, but I drifted in and out of consciousness.

And in one of those quiet moments, I had perfect recall of a day like today, many years ago. I could hear my children coming in from school, their sweet little voices, the rhythm of their footsteps, the hum of life filling the house. I could almost feel their presence. Every sound, every smell, every feeling took me back. It was so sweet to recapture that tender moment in time.

Now that I’m more awake, still tired, but functioning, I feel a little sad.
How is it that we miss days that felt so hard at the time?
Looking back, they seem easier. Sweeter.
How could that be?

Back then, Kelly and I had hardly any money. He worked constantly. And there were six little ones always underfoot. Life was loud and messy and exhausting. But somehow, it was also beautiful.

Before I got up, I tried to think about the present. I know I’ll look back on these days too, someday. I still find joy in my children, and now in their children. But today, my eyes well up with tears for the days past. They were hard, but we made it through. And some days now, I wonder if I can do the same. But I know: each experience prepares us for the ones still ahead.

For the sweet young mothers struggling right now, these are precious times. You may not see it yet, but you’re living the moments you’ll treasure later. You don’t know what the future holds, no matter how much you hope and plan.

So for now, I’m grateful for memories.
I wish I could go back sometimes.
I know I’m too tired and too old to do it all again.
But I’m grateful for the memories I do have.
What a wonderful blessing it is to remember.

Memory is a gift from God, a way to revisit the sweetness, reframe the struggle, and remind ourselves that we’ve made it through before. And with His help, we will again.